The Boredom Games

After two weeks of not watching anime, in favor of watching House on Netflix, I returned to about a dozen or more episodes of shit to watch, and was just so incredibly disappointed with some of the lot.

Kicking off this post, is a drop. I don’t drop shows easily, mainly because there is usually something keeping me around despite bad everything else. Unfortunately, Akuma no Riddle has none of those things. It was just simply boring. But I’ll try to explain why.

Everyone dies? Interesting.
Everyone dies? Interesting.

The problem with Akuma no Riddle from the start was it being another Battle Royale style pain-in-the-ass. See, American Gladiators wasn’t a good show because anyone on it was particularly interesting, it’s the fact that every week some everyman or everywoman would go up against a bunch of body-building guys and girls trying to knock them off with jousting equipment or nail them with Nerf weapons. It was stupid fun. But BR-style anime takes elimination-style games and turns it into unnecessary drama not unlike most episodes of Seinfield. Forced and un-fulfilling, leaving you only with shitty quotes that aren’t funny the fifteenth time you’ve heard them from your boss’ mouth. If Sakura Trick was playing the lesbian arc for the standard romcom group, Riddle was playing it from the XTREME BOWLING end of the spectrum that thinks a show’s depth is measured by broody emo girls trying to kill one another while listening to My Chemical Romance.

Simply put, it was just boring. There was nothing interesting to keep my attention, and at a time when I am busy with buying a house, watching better shows, and putting things in boxes, I can’t be arsed to deal with that.

Can you hear me now?
Can you hear me now?

Then there is Black Bullet.

The already juvenile dialogue turns into such unbelievable garbage even Valvrave couldn’t possibly match, and the painfully bad plot gets so predictable that it triples the suffering, because the only thing worse than watching a nauseating story like this is seeing it coming several twists away. Black Bullet is an utterly terrible show in every possible regard that no one should watch for any reason. It’s not Valrave-style bad in a hilarious way that keeps you watching just to see how far the ridiculous bullshit train goes, or the Uwe Bolle-school of deliberately producing offensive shit because you can, no, it’s bad in a way that’s both sad and downright insulting.
-Jinx (Dropping Black Bullet)

Certainly the first four episodes match what Twilight might’ve been if it were written in Japan and involved robot sex somehow. I actually was sort of okay with everything until he was revealed to be a cyborg and immediately reached for “Jesus Yamato School of Plot Hacking Number 57: YOU’RE THE HERO NOW, DOG!” It’s kind of sad really, because a show that builds its premise around these Cursed Children would make you think that Enju would be getting more of the focus here, but the writers won’t let you forget that Rentaro is Anime Obama and he can’t do wrong by anyone, ever.

But, I am holding on by a thread for this show because while we lost one character that was worth a shit, Tina Sprout isn’t half-bad for me. Enju has already been keeping me on the edge of this, but the addition of someone else who treats mornings like I do isn’t a bad thing indeed.

MFB 10-11AM
MFB 10-11AM

Well, to be fair, there is also President’s tits.

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I’ll have some more up later. Need to find something similar to House to replace this snarky void in my heart. Because I am a shitty person.

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